


Broken Courage

by ArisuAmiChan



Series: Repaired to Insanity [2]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Hollow Ichigo - Freeform, Ichigo Kurosaki - Freeform, Kisuke Urahara - Freeform, Mental Breakdown, Mental Instability, Mental Institutions, Psychological Torture, Sequel, psychological abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-27
Updated: 2014-09-27
Packaged: 2018-02-19 00:17:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2367233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArisuAmiChan/pseuds/ArisuAmiChan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A lot of credit goes to DragonGirl9897 on dA (deviantART) for helping me hash out a couple ideas! I didn't follow a their suggestion to the letter, but honestly, I'm glad I took part of it into the story! Thank you, sweetie so much!</p><p>I took forever writing this, then ever longer trying to tweak and edit it to something as decent as the original, and for that, I apologize deeply. I had moments of self-doubt, of wishing it was better and forgetting what line went where, losing my summary (also sorry for that, it's crap). Three days ago were spent editing and tweaking this (again) and I KEPT LOSING MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT AND WHAT I WANTED TO ADD! Okay so, totally alternate timeline/universe combo going on here but hospital mentioned? Totally one hundred percent real.</p><p>Make sure to read <em>'Repaired to Insanity'</em> before this, however, to understand why Ichigo is where he is.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Broken Courage

**Author's Note:**

> A lot of credit goes to DragonGirl9897 on dA (deviantART) for helping me hash out a couple ideas! I didn't follow a their suggestion to the letter, but honestly, I'm glad I took part of it into the story! Thank you, sweetie so much!
> 
> I took forever writing this, then ever longer trying to tweak and edit it to something as decent as the original, and for that, I apologize deeply. I had moments of self-doubt, of wishing it was better and forgetting what line went where, losing my summary (also sorry for that, it's crap). Three days ago were spent editing and tweaking this (again) and I KEPT LOSING MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT AND WHAT I WANTED TO ADD! Okay so, totally alternate timeline/universe combo going on here but hospital mentioned? Totally one hundred percent real.
> 
> Make sure to read _'Repaired to Insanity'_ before this, however, to understand why Ichigo is where he is.

* * *

Ichigo was silent, settled on the floor in the corner of the padded cell. A straight jacket bound his arms close to his in order to prevent him from lashing out at orderlies and him, it had happened before, Ichigo hitting the men and threatening the women during the first six weeks of his stay there at the Saint Luke's International Hospital in Chūō, Tokyo.

From outside the room, men and women stood, studying him like he was a wild animal in captivity. He couldn't leave. He was finally trapped. He had no way out, no way to leave... He _was_ an animal in a cage. He now understood how the tigers at the zoo felt...

The doctor in charge of Ichigo's case made new notes on his scratch pad as he watched the teenager. _'Subject is silent, looking ill. The Kurosaki boy utters a name -Zangetsu- every so often. Could this be the other personality he claims to have? Patient was admitted three months ago, previous doctor dismissing them-self from his case after an incident.'  
_

There were screams around them, shocked gasps. Ichigo had moved to the door keeping him from the outside, a disgusting leer on his face. "Hey, doc! Gonna try to profile us, hmm? Get inside our head at all?"

Ichigo's voice had changed, was like he had a voice enhancer held up to his mouth in order to distort it. "Kurosaki-kun, we are here to help you."

Gold eyes rolled, white sclera bleeding into black slowly. "Help 'im? More like poke 'n prod 'til King breaks."

"Who is 'King?' Kurosaki-san? Or yourself? The personality Kurosaki-san refers to as Zangetsu?"

"King is king, moron. King is the horse now, 'n 'm the king! Zangetsu is Zangetsu, or 'm Zangetsu. Who knows?" The not-Ichigo gave a dangerous smirk, shuffld back to the corner and hung his head, allowing the borrowed body to go limp. When the doctor was sure nothing else would happen, it assured him the other personality had receded.

The doctor made frantic notes in his journal. _'Kurosaki seems to have another personality. DID, perhaps? He shows symptoms of it... But this personality is developed enough to keep track of Kurosaki's surroundings, as well as address people...'_ The doctor scowled at the enigma known as Ichigo Kurosaki, curious.

"Give Kurosaki a low dose of sedative and send him to my office." He spoke to a startled young lady beside him, the girl nodding.

"Yes, sir."

She left quickly and returned with the requested medication, brown eyes looking up as she entered the room, a deer caught in the headlights of a car looking back at her.

"No! Please, not again! _He'll_ come out again if you do, please! DON'T!" The orange haired teen screamed, trying to get away from the nurse with the needle, scared out of his mind. "NO!"

He lashed out with a foot, trying to kick her, success meeting him as she stumbled and dropped that capped needle and small vial.

The doors were opened again, orderlies rushing in to hold and restrain the struggling Ichigo, the young lady shaken from the attack. Ichigo's psychiatrist came in, he picking up vial and injection tool, making quick work of the dosage. "Kurosaki-san, we only want to help you, okay? There's no need to fear."

"You don't understand! _He'll_ come out again! He'll kill you all!" He shouted, psychiatrist's brow furrowing in confusion.

"Who will come out again?"

" _It!_ That bastard, the demon! The monster! The hollow!"

Hollow...? Did he mean the fellow who called himself the 'horse' and Zangetsu? "Ichigo, I'm only trying to figure out why you broke down the way you did." He soothed, nodding to an orderly to roll down the waist band of those pale blue pants, he piercing tanned skin with the needle and injecting Ichigo with the sedative, sending him off into a gentle rest.

Rising from his stooped posture, he spoke quickly. "Bring him to my office and use the restraints on the chair. I will _not_ tolerate any failures this time. He nearly escaped last time."

The men and women nodded, one lifting Ichigo up and settling him in a wheel chair for transportation. Inside his mind, Ichigo sat on one of the buildings, a window reflecting memories back at him, a source of entertainment in such a dreary place.

The orderly (the two other orderlies had left them to handle another patient in the west wing) and doctor settled him in the chair in that office with its supposedly calming blue walls, making sure the restraints were in place, but not too tight to cut off circulation. _  
_

Settling in his seat, taking up his work from earlier in the day before his rounds the doctor awaited Ichigo's awaken, adding the new notes from paper to a file on his computer, keyboard clicking softly.

From the safety seat after a half hour, the young man shook his head, trying to clear the built-up fuzz. Tugging his wrists to make an attempt to release himself, the Velcro strained and groaned in protest.

"Kuorsaki-san? Can you hear me?"

"As much as I don' wanna..." He slurred, blurry brown eyes blinking against the light.

"Now, now, I'm only trying to help you feel _much_ better."

Huffing, Ichigo went silent. He spent a good ten minutes trying to worm his ankles and wrists free from their positions, hoping to break the Velcro without drawing attention to his actions or call on his reiatsu.

"Why the hell d'ya care?" He grumbled after a while, done for now with his escape.

The doctor leaned back in his seat, studying Ichigo closely. Green eyes were intent upon the teenager, voice calm and collected. "We only wish to help. Try to understand what has happened to you. Certain traumas can cause different reactions in people. I know your mother passed when you were still young. You were there, were you not?"

"DON'T TALK ABOUT HER!" The angry shout came unbidden, brown eyes finally meeting those of his caretaker. "You have _no_ right to talk about my mom!"

"I meant no harm, Kurosaki-san. I only wish to say that due to such a traumatic event, this 'Zangetsu' or 'horse,' as he referred to himself as, may be a manifestation of this trauma."

"Don't. I'm not talking about her! You have no reason to ask about mom, let alone mention her!" Ichigo was furious, lucid now and recalling the memories his hollow used to his advantage.

 _How he changed aspects of happier ones into dark nightmares. How the white twin made her say things Masaki would_ never _say. That was the worst of them all..._

He looked away to the window to watch the azure sky. _It was so pretty outside that day..._

"Why don't you tell me about this Zangetsu? Is-"

Whipping his head around, Ichigo stared at the man in shock, his voice only a whisper. "How do you know that name...?"

Shifting in the chair, the doctor cleared his throat. "Your other personality spoke it. Could you tell me who they are?"

"I'm not telling you anything, so you can just go to hell!" Ichigo snapped, looking away again to watch a robin flying past the glass. Closing his eyes to try and calm himself, to try and regain some sense of balance, Ichigo breathed in deeply before exhaling, allowing his Hollow the metaphorical driver's seat for the duration of the meeting.

"I'll fuckin' kill ya. 'n that lil bitch who tried ta drug King. I ain't takin' tha' shit." Raising a brow at the other entity, the doctor frowned. It appeared he had awoken Ichigo's better half. Brown eyes were changing over to the sunflower-golden yellow upon inky black night sky color as he watched.

"What is a 'hollow?' Why did Ichigo refer to you as such?"

"Hollow's none a yer business, doc. And I 'm what I 'm."

"It _is_ my business."

"Ya suck at yer job, yer wife's gonna leave ya, 'n yer kid hates ya." The hollow said, grinning as wide as Ichigo's lips would allow.

"I never chose this job for myself, I am a single man, and have no children." He lied, his marriage happy and planning on getting carnations for his wife and a new children's book for his daughter.

"Wha' evah ya say, boss."

"How did you come to be?"

"How did ya come ta be?"

The man rolled his eyes. "Please, can we be series for a moment?"

The dark Ichigo sighed and sobered up, face serious this time. "Yeah, why th' hell no'?"

"Why are you taking over Ichigo? Why not let him live in peace?"

"I wan' his power, body, ev'rythin' fer my own. I wanna feel th' life leave tha' lil dark haired slut 'n I wanna ram mah sword up tha' prick's ass so far, he'll vomit shit for a good few years. I wanna watch 'im cry as I take eve'yone he loves 'n kill 'em. I wanna do a lo' tha' king won' lemme do, which is why 'm here talkin' ta ya, doc."

"Why do you keep referring to Ichigo as 'King?' What makes him a king? Some sort of blood line in his family?"

"King's the one in control." He murmured, eyes glancing off to the side. Like a guilty child caught in the cookie jar... "King's king 'cause he's go' control."

"Of what, if I may ask?"

"His mind, body, soul. Eve'y thin'." The not Ichigo said, eyes darting up to meet the doctor's again.

"Why?"

"Why no'? Haven' ya ever wan'ed anythin' bad enough tha' ya'd kill fer it?"

The doctor frowned at that. There were several things that applied to that question.

A new house, a better car, a better job or at the very least, a higher pay to afford some things he and his family could use...

"No." He lied instead, knowing this non-human entity was trying to play with him, trying to mess with his head.

"Aww... Doc, c'mon! Don' ya lie ta me." Those odd color changing eyes narrowed in a glare, the false Ichigo speaking in a hushed tone. "Makes me wanna kill ya fer it."

"How do you know I'm lying? For all you know, I could be telling the truth."

"I know, doc. Now untie king. He's gonna come back 'n pass out." Those strange eyes closed and as said, Ichigo had returned and was passed out in the chair, slumped over but breathing still.

There was a soft sigh from the doctor as he flicked through the new notes. 'Dark haired slut,' 'a prick.'

_Who were these people?_

Who did he have to talk to to gain the information he needed? He sat in silence, lost in his thoughts until a knock startled him.

"Come in!"

An orderly came in, a wheel chair pushed before them. "Sir, someone is here to check Kurosaki out."

A confused blink. "What do you mean? Kurosaki has no emergency contact on his paper work!"

The woman shrugged. "I don't know, sir. This man says Kurosaki _has_ to be released." She unstrapped Ichigo from the chair and gently moved him into the wheel chair, making sure he was sitting up properly and shoe covered feet were settled on the foot rests.

"Did he give you a name?"

"Not at all! He said he was a friend of Kurosaki's and wanted to check him out."

"I will _not_ allow it! You tell this person Kurosaki isn't leaving this facility until _I_ deem him ready!"

"Sir, he had the proper paper work from another psychiatric hospital. He claims he can take care of Kurosaki much better there than we can here."

The man frowned. "I'm coming with you. I want to see this man and paper work for myself."

Both doctor and orderly left the room with Ichigo, the young man still fainted from his inner-hollow's visit to the outside world. He only looked it to the staff, whereas though he was only in his inner-world, sitting before his zanpakutō's favorite spot, wishing the Old Man was there to provide aid.

"Oh my..." The 'doctor' up front murmured when Ichigo came into view, pulling his green and white striped hat off his head.

_Urahara Kisuke had come to save the day._

"Excuse me, doctor. I'd like to see the transfer papers for Kurosaki-san." There was a bright and happy smile that graced the blond man's lips, he producing the paper work from some pocket of the brown-gray coat he wore.

"Of course! I hope these meet your assessment." The papers were handed over, Ichigo's current doctor taking them with a sharp motion, focusing on the forged lines before his beryl green irises.

"... Everything seems to be in order..." He grumbled, a Grade-A scowl on his face at the loss of his most interesting patient. By the time the doctor approved Urahara's paper work, Ichigo was partly awake, eavesdropping on the conversation or lack there of.

_And then, he was moving. Headed to the glass doors that allowed warm sunlight to beam in and shine along the cold flooring._

When they were outside, Urahara took his hat off. He plunked it upon limp and dull orange locks, giving Ichigo shade for his vision, the young man slowly shifting in the seat and responding to the warm breath of summer air that came over his chilled cheeks.

"Mmhm...? Goin' outside...?" He slurred, faking his rest still. Ichigo was tempted to look at whom ever was pushing him along, ask them if he could walk around for a bit.

"Going home, Kurosaki-san." Urahara assured, smile no longer there, gone now that his student was freed from the cages and nightmares locking him in the institution.

Registering the hat on his head, Ichigo's gaze drifted up to the brim, eyes studying the fabric, finally figuring out whom was pushing him away from his hell. "Urahara-san?"

"Indeed, indeed, my dear boy! I'm taking you back to the shop and then, when you are clean and sober, we shall see a few friends of mine whom may be able to help you..."

Ichigo's head bobbed again, he mumbling something to the elder man. "... Hollow... Gotta beat him..."

"Yes, Ichigo. You must do what you can to control him better. My friends will be able to help you, rest assured. Take my word for it..." He whispered, a harried looking woman walking past them, eyes on the ground and body language speaking of her distaste at having to visit whomever she had committed or was required to visit at the hospital.

A hat covered head bobbed in response, Ichigo willing to try whatever Urahara's allies had in store for him now that his own methods had failed.

"But in the mean time, why don't I take you to get a bit of ice cream?" Urahara spoke normally, cheerfulness back once again, Ichigo giving a small smile at the thought of the sweet treat.

"I was always given pills 'n jello... Never ice cream..." The teenager mumbled, ready to dance and sing hosannas of joy to the Spirit King himself if given the chance.

Urahara glared over his shoulder at the hospital, tempted to blow it to pieces with kido. "Well, today is your very lucky day, my boy. Freedom and ice cream are a man's favorite things..."

**Author's Note:**

> To explain how Ichigo ended up where he is in the quickest way I can: It's not just tiredness that caused Ichigo's snapping, but the altering of his memories of allies, friends, and family. Nightmares caused by his 'Hollow' that left him awake late at night and afraid to sleep again. Finding trigger points that can be used to cause illness to Ichigo to withdraw him from studies or social activities, among other things.
> 
> All those things added up over the course of three months and Ichigo broke.


End file.
